The Lancashire Witches - from the archives of the Project Gutenberg

As writers we know how daunting it can be to face the blank page, and sometimes we do little things to build up our courage so we can have a productive day. Some people keep inspirational quotes or motivational sayings near their writing desk. Some people read a page or two from their favorite book to pump themselves up, while others start their sessions by doing some freewriting, to warm up their writerly muscles as it were. Every writer is different.

Here are the three things I do before diving in for a day’s work:

1. I’m a morning writer, so it’s essential that I eat a good breakfast. Some people swear by their protein shakes, but I’m hooked on an eclectic little potion I buy from three homely sisters out of the Czech Republic. It’s a bit expensive, and the ingredients on their own, wing of black bat, blood of gargoyle, paw of black cat, an ogre’s boil, are disgusting, but I’m telling you after you blend them all together and pour that creamy froth down your throat you’ll wonder why it’s not available in every GNC.

It makes you feel so great afterwards, really energetic, like your soul just went up a size. Which may have something to do with the warning on the package that says someone in the world dies every time you make it, but hey, somebody’s got to suffer for your art, and why should it be you?

2. People love their yoga and their meditation, don’t they? What I do is sort of a combination of both. First, I turn off all the lights in my room and then light the candles I’ve arranged in an intricate and precise pattern on the floor, according to specifications recommended by Tobin’s Spirit Guide. I then sit on a meditation pillow and say these words in my head over and over “Ixkash, Axkash, Oxkash, Exkash.” And I keeping doing it until a different voice in my head takes over; it’s a pretty deep, ground-rattling voice, actually, and eventually it gets so loud I have to let it just speak through me. Sometimes I say zany stuff like “The gates of Hell need more children’s bones,” or “Succumb to me or my demon crows will devour your flesh.” Other times, I’ll say “Combine chapters 3 and 4 and move them to the end of part 2…now I will build an altar to sacrifice your virgins.” Oh, and the yoga part is that I’m able to spin my head 360 degrees. Yeah, I’d like to see any Bikram fanatic do that!

I find this all really gets my adrenaline going and the creative juices flowing. I have had some cloven feet issues in the past, and it does hurt to urinate for about an hour afterwards, but it’s worth it. My writing has definitely benefited.

3.  Last but not least, I listen to thirty minutes of Yanni. Whenever I tell people this it really creeps them out. I don’t get it.  There’s nothing to be afraid of.

So that’s me. How do you build up the courage to face the blank page?