June’s Flash Fiction Contest came to an end yesterday, and after luring our judges into a closed-door session I sneaked off with the submissions and ultimately chose Scott Ritchie’s ominous (or pleasantly surprising, depending on your point of view) interpretation of our theme “Happy Returns.”

Here’s Scott’s story:

He had seen the letter addressed to him was odd, even before he opened it. Now, there was no doubt that its page was more fabric than paper; coarse, scented and gilded with a single line of glowing script that read, “Dear Dad, I am happy to report I arrived safely and will not tell Mom about the organ transplant.” It caused him to shudder, for he had no children, was not married, and yet here was clearly an abdominal scar where there was none before.

Congratulations, Scott!

Now, as promised, your prize, a glowing three-sentence tribute to the majesty of you. Here goes:

When Scott Ritchie isn’t winning flash fiction contests he’s traveling the country defending his record for most pancake house fires survived (15 as of this writing). Scott Ritchie can dance flawlessly to the rhythm of a clock’s second hand while knee-high in a tub of molasses. When Scott Ritchie sees colors he’s simultaneously seeing them in the billion different ways the earth’s entire human population sees colors.

As evidenced here, Scott Ritchie is certainly someone worth getting to know.

Thank you to everyone who participated in this round, hope you had a good time. Look for another flash fiction contest as soon as I find the key to that room those judges are locked inside.