Great news, everyone!

After only 10 months, we here behind the scenes at bryanhilson.com have reached a consensus regarding the updated alert sounds fixed to internal communications.

Hoo-ray!

And FYI, per “Addendum A” to the agreement, our CFO will have his thumbs reattached just as soon as the new-content freeze on the website has been officially lifted.

Look, we all knew that Braying Donkey was too subtle, but what was the better alternative? Well, thanks to the focus, hard work, and extortion of everyone involved, we’ll now know an incoming office email when we hear Entire Generations Of Geese Flying Blind Through A Never-Ending Wind Farm.

Additionally, Trello alerts will no longer be Food-Poisoned John Philip Sousa Band On Exploding Steamboat In The Middle Of A Raging Rapids but Well Who Puts Their Bare Hands In The Garbage Disposal instead. Slack messages will switch from Murmuring Dread to Silent Scream In The Breakroom When Janine From Tech Support Shows You 65 Pics Of Her Schnauzers Dressed Up As That Banker From The Monopoly Game.

And lest you think we’ve regulated all autonomy out of the company, ringtones on company cells are at the discretion of the employee. Oh, but with one exception. Per “Addendum B” Trav in HR has first dibs on “Rock and Roll, Hoochie Koo.”  

The blog is back in business!